sleepless in lubbock

I can't sleep.. maybe it is because i am used to sleeping next to Tanner.. since i crashed at his house the last 2 nights.. or maybe it is because of the 2 cups of coffee i had with dinner. Either way, it got me thinking.. about what I want to do in my life, and about what great people i have in my everyday life.


Christine is probably the best friend, and basically the best person I know! She is so supportive of everyone.. in their hard times, and the good ones too!! She has been there for me personally, more times than I can count! even today.. i got a little melancholy, and she sent me this "You are a wonderful, beautiful inside and out woman." how awesome is that?!?! she goes so much further than just saying you are wonderful.. or your an awesome person (which is about as good as I can do) Christine tells you something that you don't even know about your self, or something you may have forgotten. She just knows when a person needs an encouraging word or two, and has been my life saver more than she knows! She loves her God, husband, family and friends with her all, all the time.. and it has inspired me to do the same! There is no doubt in my mind whom I want standing next to me as matron of Honor on my wedding day!!! Love yew Christine!!

 Magen.. how to sum up magen.. she is my sister.. soon by marriage, but its been that way since the day i met her. She is a straight shooter.. if she thinks something, your going to know it. And I love that about her!! She thinks outside of the box, and that really comes in handy.. a lot! She is a wonderful mom to my nephew and niece.. and i know she probably gets stressed out sometimes, but she handles things with a certain grace. She is always good for making everyone laugh.. especially if it involves registering for wedding gifts! Magen is great.. a true God fearing woman, inside and out! Love ya sister!!

Tanner.. tanner is my rock. In many ways he has been my salvation. I didn't know true love until he came into my life.. and I knew we were meant to be together in a matter of days. Things are different with him.. I know my past doesn't matter, and that he accepts me no matter what. I am free to be me, and to discover exactly who me is! Tanner is so full of faith in God, that it makes me want to strive to be a better child of God. Being with Tanner makes me want to be a better person, but he supports me no matter what!! Which is more important than I ever realized. Tanner is proud to have me on his arm, even if I'm in sweats with no make up (which is pretty often) and he always puts my safety first. In fact, he always puts me first. I want everyone I know and care for to have a relationship like mine. With someone that they love so much that they can't wait to see them, or talk to them first thing in the morning, someone that they can see themselves getting old with, and being okay with that picture.. as long as they are together in the end. Someone they would go to bat for 100% of the time.. no questions asked. Someone that you love, and that loves you back with such a ferocity that it manifests into a physical ache at times.. Because true love hurts, but it is a really good, soul touching hurt, that you never want to go away!! I love you Tanner Kyle, and I can not wait to become your bride!!

I want to help people.. I don't know how yet, but I know I want to make an impact in people's lives.. To save people from addiction, or find children forever homes.. or save marriages.. something that when I get to heaven I know I made a difference in someones life. Made life easier, or more meaningful for at least one person.. I believe this is what God has planned for me, and if I'm wrong I know He will let me know!

So, goodnight to the friends I have that follow this blog.. you are all wonderful, unique men and women.. and our God loves you so very much!!